How can I learn to accept that self-reliance is a value but depending on others is a strength
Growth isn’t about behaving more in according to one’s values. To me, it’s about challenging those beliefs and values on a regular basis, and being prepared to keep or modify them as the evidence necessitates. I mean, I could find simple stability by embracing my values but then I’d have the exact same mindset throughout my life, assuming that I was correct at all times and I simply won’t be.
I’ve taken care of myself, and my mother, for decades especially in her later years. Even when I was stuck taking disability ten years ago, I still took care of her. But now I am having to focus on taking care of myself and am finding that I am unable to do so without accepting more help than I am comfortable accepting. Specifically, I am having to use the food bank to keep healthy, balanced meals on the table and it has been a demoralizing blow to my ego. I’ve stocked my pantry with staples but protein and vegetables will pose an issue in the coming weeks as I work my way through what’s in my fridge and freezer.
As a result I have had to make some tough realizations about myself and my life, not the least of which is that I am no longer completely self reliant. When I first went on disability I had to accept the help but could also say that I had paid into the system since I was twenty five and the help I was receiving was simply me getting back a portion of what I had put into it. Now, I’m having to ask for charity aid from strangers, at least for the time being and I’m having a difficult time with it. These people are not only willing to help me, they are actively volunteering their time to organize the food bank and staff it when it is open. I want to volunteer too, albeit for a different charity, in the coming months. I want to help those people who need it. How can I make the people I help in that situation feel better about getting the help they need and deserve?
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